internal affairs of a traffic cop changin the world in front of me!!!!

Morning… I reached the Arakere Gate bus stop.. The beautiful countryside, with the beautiful flowing river, the green hillside,the breathtaking beauty and the lovely people...wat a perfect sight to greet u on a sunday mornin..
what am I talking about… it’s a sadass bangalore suburb with a sewer drainage, a mountain of refuse and well err beautiful people??

Wearing helmet is compulsory in bangalore (just for two wheeler drivers obviously!!!) and the day that rule was passed good times for traffic cops, helmet manufacturers and people like me who jus love to watch the fun., began!!!!

Today there were 3 traffic cops, waiting for the fresh catch of the day… I got down from the bus and instead of going through the short cut right in front of me, I went near the traffic cops to watch the fun…

There was one cop who was the boss..like the entire boss species (no offense to bachelor of social service bosses) he was doin absolutely nothin other than lookin at the whole spectacle with a disinterested gaze of a moron dumped when the last spaceship crashed from mars... He just stands behind his bike and signs the documents made by the other cops.
Other 2 cops were the hard, diligent and sincere workers, they run around trying to
catch anybody whose head is uncovered...
The poor bikers without a helmet were sticking to extreme right of the road.. but our hard workin diligent cops run thru the road avoidin the heavy incomin traffic (thank gawd these guys havnt heard of pandi lorries...) stand right in front of the biker with an outstretched hands and making the biker smell his armpit and make him disgusted wid himself and the life ands compellin him to stop and park his bike near the BOSS... Boss will look at him critically and do the complex calculus calculations and finally make up his mind on the round figure that the man shud part wid.... i saw values ranging from 100 to the poor guy in a TVS Luna and one dude partin with 500 bucks for comin in karizma... after watchin this spectacle for sometime i moved on...
I see one old guy comin in his scooter (without a helmet..)...real slowly on the left side...an easy target for the govt (or the cops) to fill its coffers... i stretched my hands and pointin my forefinger to my head shouted helmet checkin.. the guy was so startled for an instant that i thot he'll just crash on me in his ancient mode of transport... but he composed himself... stopped his sccoter and took a u-turn from the same side and went in the oppsoite direction towards the oncomin traffic... thats the last i heard of him.....
while i was watchin the guy in scooter leave there were lottsa ppl goin without helmets..fast and on the right side... there was one small guy in a bike who is too small to have a license itself, ridin without a helmet..

so i went back to see wat unfolds next... wonders of wonders.. the cops are busy writin tickets and they are not bothered with wats happenin on the road... and the whole bunch left without the cops even glancing at them... i was upset at this turn of events... so waited till the cops squeezed pennies from everyone they'd caught till then, said goodbye and sent them scurryin and then only turned their attention to the road...

One guy on his bike saw the cop and hid behind a jeep... the clever cop just stopped the jeep and this guy is like yea i was comin 2 see u to the cop!!!!

these hardworkin dedicated sincere cops were so immersed in blockin poor helmetless two wheeler drivers that they didn notice ppl goin in triples!!!

i think i was standin suspiciously watchin the whole proceedings becuz one of the cops started pointin at my direction and started talkin somethin 2 his colleague...
Cop1: that guy is standin there watchin us for a long time... wat dya think are his intentions???
Cop2: must be searchin for writin somethin in his blog....
Cop1: blog???are u crazy??? he looks all dashing and mysterious...do u think we shd arrest him???
Cop2: ooooh..now i remember... i think he was the guy who was havin sex with my wife the other day...lets ask BOSS....
Cop2 to BOSS: Boss was he the guy havin sex with my wife the other day??
BOSS: hehehehe..i fooled u...it was me not him!!!!
Cop2: Bastard.....(and shoots him)
Cop1: bastard....(and shoots cop2)
and then blows away his own sweet brains..and my sweet lord, instead of the white n grey brain, theres a green coloured bullshit smellin thing comin from his brain!!!!:O
needless to say i was quite surprised...
(I learned later that the Cop2 and BOSS were attracted towards each other the brokeback mountain way and the sudden death of prince of his dreams brought out an emotional outburst from Cop2 which ended with 2 lives... And BOSS was jus jokin when he said he was havin sex with Cop1's wife... and the part where i'd sex with the cop's wife..keep guessin)

thought: if u r drivin a bike without helmets and u see a traffic cop catchin bikers without helmets, then stop till the cops have caught ahndful and then go as if everythings normal..and don look at the cops...

afterthought: if u r drivin a bike without helmets and u don see traffic cop catchin bikers without helmets, then u r goin really fast...slow down...

after afterthought: if u r drivin a bike without helmets and u don see traffic cop catchin bikers without helmets , and u r goin like slowly n all...then the chances are there won't be any traffic cop waitin to catch u...

after the second afterthought: if u r not drivin a bike none of this will ever happen..so relax...

Next afterthought: Don ever stare at cops and watch all the fun.. atleast dial 111 and listen to wat the mechanised horny chick from hutch has 2 say abt my account balance...

Last afterthought: Don ever have sex with a cops wife... especially if his colleague is havin an affair with his BOSS and the BOSS makes stupid jokes about his wife...

Love,peace gawd!!!!!

actually this is the last thought:i saw a sardarji goin without a helmet...wonder wat happened to him...